lviing at The Ideal

This is my room in the Ideal Hotel. More photos of San Diego to follow.

yet....

There is change afoot. America is has been struggling to find an identity outside of its fascination for consumption and the historical legacy of slavery, racism, and its attachment to Manifest Destiny for at least the last forty years. Rebranding the U.S seems to be the foremost theme in our political landscape, but I think it goes far deeper than simply an image change that most Americans are seeking.

So my indictment of the last post of the very American New Age movement might be a bit hasty and one dimensional. A more thoughtful analysis sees the emergence and evolution of this movement since the sixties as an engine for an uniquely American spiritual understanding and alternative to traditional hierarchical "religious" approaches, and one possible opportunity to subvert the ongoing commodification of everything and everyone . So, I can live with the faulty reasoning, the half baked ideas, the wildly imaginative storytelling; loving some of the characters within this microcosm of the world with this understanding.

The only thing that still irks me is when capitalistic tendencies infect this sometimes naive possibility to hope (much like they have the populist, environmental, and social movements), and what follows is denial and ugly rationalization around its effect from its most charismatic leaders.

Yes, that pains me.

The new age

It seems every time I spend any amount of time in California I run into various interpretations of this idea of a New Age, and everything related to this phenomenon. All if it has to do with some vague notion of spirituality that is rooted in lifestyle choices that always seem to center around extreme vegetarianism/veganism, some sort of eastern influenced movement practice, and a penchant for attempting to conflate scientific theories around the material universe into some sort of guide book for how to frame non-material truths. I'll give you an example:

Yesterday I attended a "talk" by a San Diegan who happens to be staying here at The Ideal Hotel before he leaves on a world tour funded through credit card debt that he has no intention of paying back. He brought up the "golden proportion", a very interesting mathematical proof that establishes a singular proportionality to certain material phemonmena. Similar to Pii, this concept is known as Phi (pronounced phee), and is a fairly complex mathematical concept in and of itself. He stated that this mathematical relationship is proof that we are all connected and that everything is One. Lovely, but when further questioned on his understanding of the mechanics of this proof, he had no foundation in its mathematical core, and simply dismissed that knowledge as erroneous except where it fit his point.

Now, I am fairly open to new things, and am trying very hard not to be a judgemental person, but this type of shit drives me crazy! What was amazing was that everyone in the room was ready to throw out any sort of rigour around his arguement and simply nod their heads in agreement. To futher my consternation, almost everyone I met in the room that night was "swimmy" eyed and had very little of interest to say (except for the couple from Virginia Beach who were the flotsam I clung to in this ocean of New Age sentiment).

Other arugements I have heard over the course of the last week that I'll paraphrase:

"Love is limitless. If we give more love we'll get more love". (Sounds good, right?) " I mean, I dont understand all these conservationists who tell us to conserve water, to conserve money. To conserve.... I mean just like love, we should spend money, use water, and it will all come back to us one day." Huh?

I arrest my case. This New Age hippie bullshit ain't for me.

sniffles

A Friday morning, after a troubled night of sleep, and now the sniffles. The Ideal Hotel is starting to fill with new people, both guests and residents. Hip Fu had his first night here last night, although his stuff preceded him by a week. We are still trying to sort through all the material he brought, from washing machines to stem ware.

Darshana's friends will be arriving this afternoon, and Robert will be visiting as well.
I am feeling a bit loathe to join the masses this morning, and find myself hiding out in my room a little bit, knowing the next few days will be extremely social. I should probably describe all these unique characters I mentioned above, in turn. That will have to wait for another post. For now, its the sniffles, followed by a shower, and then some physical movement.

more cali

There' s my girl! Of course, more California coastline in the background.

california dreaming

Here is an image from our drive up the coast of California. I believe this is just north of Santa Barbara. The image speaks for itself. Here's to the best of the west.

the marathon begins

Its been a week since my whirlwind tour back to the east coast. I have settled into some semblance of a routine here in San Diego, a routine that has thus far been pretty productive but a bit depressing. Engagement in the social is a very important piece of my personality and here my options in San Diego are limited to a small and sometimes ephemeral RLS community. There are some incredibly sweet people here, and Michael and Holen have been great to spend time with daily, but I am so used to being spoiled by a diversity of people and experience in NYC, that this is taking some serious getting used. to. The other part of the struggle I am having is that I am having to learn to create an independent work schedule for myself. My entire working life has comprised of some sort of structure that has been created outside of myself. Making this structure happen on my own has made me slightly anxious, as I am always trying to find a way to feel like I am doing all that I need to be doing in a moment. The simple act of going to work allows one to have a seperation between relaxation and productivity. Here, I am either constantly working, or fully disconnected from any sort of work with a vague sense of unease creeping at the edges of my mind.

Yet, as I mentioned, I have gotten a lot done, in particular with writing projects. Oh, the reference to the marathon is getting through this strech of time till Thanksgiving. I'll be headed up to The Bay Area then to spend the holiday weekend with Karin and her sisters fam.

installment from the road

After a long drive up the coast with Karin, stopping every night to camp, we are at the McCarthy residence in Napa. I am here for one week before I head back east to continue pursuing information around this graduate school thing I have gotten into my head as the next thing I am doing. Before I plunge headlong into describing that process (which is mostly in my head), let me describe a little of our journey up the coast (which is real and has pictures to prove it).

We left the intensity of RLS/San Diego on the 29th of September, with a departure committee gathered in front of the Ideal Hotel. Karin was behind the wheel ( I have yet to get fully comfortable with the idea of driving), and we headed up the coast on the infamous highway 5 towards L. A with no intention of stopping there at all. Of course, as it probably does to many, Hollywoood Blvd seduced us off the highway. We did a little tour of the strip without getting out of the car, and marvelled at the big Hollywood sign as well the walk of stars. Both seemed much more accessible than either Karin or I had imagined, an iconic set of symbols amidst the ordnariness of daily commuter and gritty streets. Suprisingly, L.A on this quick visit left me with some desire to roll up for a weekend and check it out from an insiders perspective. Perhaps I'll call Afropunk James or someone else and make a weekend trip of it from San Diego.

After L.A came the affluent Santa Barbara, our scheduled stop for lunch and a stroll. We ended up in an Indian restaurant with a really good lunch special. The owner was chatty and curious, and shared his reason for living in Santa Barbara. It seemed pretty obvious, the town itself is situated in one of the most scenic spots along the southern and central California coast, is one hour away from L.A yet maintains its small town feel, has plenty of services and cultural activities, and seems a great place to retire or raise children. Of course, underneath the surface I suspect there is plenty of darkness in the way of marginalized populations, and a sizable homeless and transient population.